Memorable Quotes from
Land of the Dead (2005)
Kaufman: Zombies, man. They creep me out.
Kaufman: In a world where the dead are returning to life, the word "trouble" loses much of its meaning.
Kaufman: We do not negotiate with terrorists!
Charlie: What happened, Riley, did you get fucked?
Kaufman: You have no right!
Riley: Take us north.
Charlie: Nice shooting.
Riley: Good shooting, Charlie. No such thing as nice shooting.
Kaufman: [talking about Cholo] You're dead. You really are *dead*!
Special Forces Leader: What the hell is going on here?
Riley: Someone shot the little fat man.
Manolete: [about the rapidly adapting zombies] Do you really think they can cross the river?
Mike: It's like a bad dream.
Charlie: I have bad dreams. Hell, yes. Just look at me, you can tell I have terrible dreams.
Slack: [talking about Riley] You take care of him, huh?
Charlie: Hell, yeah. He pulled me out of the fire. It was bad... Just look at me, you can tell it was bad.
Pillsbury: [Motown is hotwiring a car] Yellow to red!
Motown: What the fuck does a Samoan know about hotwiring a fucking car?
Pillsbury: 50,000 cars stolen in Samoa every year.
Motown: Well, a million in Detroit.
Pillsbury: Detroit has 50 million cars. Samoa, 50,000. Every one stolen.
Cholo: Looks like God left the phone off the hook.
'High Noon' Soldier: Stench, high noon.
Mike: They're pretending to be alive...
Riley: Isn't that what we're doing? Pretending to be alive?
Riley: [about the fireworks] Put some flowers in the graveyard.
Charlie: "Put some flowers in the graveyard". How come you call them that, Riley? I don't get it. There here ain't the kind of flowers you lay on the ground, these here are sky flowers. Way up in heaven...
Riley: That's why I love you, Charlie, 'cause you still believe in heaven.
Pillsbury: I came here to do something. So, we are gonna stand around, or we are gonna do something?
Slack: Charlie, why do you lick your rifle?
Charlie: Catches the light.
Slack: What light? How can you see anything?
Charlie: Good eye.
Cholo: [a shot is fired] What the hell's that?
Brubaker: Oh, that's just target practice.
[scene cuts to soldiers]
Soldier: There's nothing there, man.
[he's attacked by Big Daddy and screams]
Cholo: OK, so what the hell's that, screaming practice?
Slack: What's your story, Riley?
Riley: I don't have one, nothing bad ever happened to me.
Charlie: [to Slack] Riley likes to be alone. He might take me, because he says being with me is just like being alone.
Cholo: How many times have I told you, Riley, stop banging chicks with more problems than you.
Riley: [Slack shoots open the door, startling him] What the fuck are you doing?
Slack: I'm making myself useful!
Riley: [gets attacked by a zombie] *Now* shoot!
Cholo: [Riley shows up] You were always the smart one, Riley, much smarter than me.
Riley: [under his breath] Not saying much.
Cholo: [to Mouse] There are three things a man must do alone - be born, die and, well, we all know the other one.
Board Member: Hey, what's in those bags?
Kaufman: Oh, look, over there!
[pulls him down and shoots him]